What is Neurosis?

Written by: Eva Li

Most of us are considered to be mentally healthy people. What if I told you that only 4% of the population are actually "mentally healthy?" Little deviant things in people's behavior became a part of our daily life.

They are so common that we stop paying attention to them and considering them to be “wrong.” Many suffer from mental health afflictions, such as neurosis.

The two largest groups of people with mental disorders are neurotics and people with borderline personality disorder. The first group is closest to a normal mental state; people from the second group are one step away from being a psychotic. The formal definition for a psychotic is a person with serious mental damage—congenital or acquired. Those afflicted need to be under the constant supervision of a psychiatrist.

Let’s go in depth on the first group. Neurosis is a disorder that causes a state of relatively mild chronic stress that influences one’s personality traits and actions. Psychologists often notice that neurotics are the most socially-conscious and nice people, as they always put others first. Neurotics always worry about what people think about them. As a result, neurotics know how to avoid hurting someone’s feelings and how to perform the best in every situation. Neurotics often have trouble with anxiety and apologizing for everything. They are very logical and likely to analyze themselves (leading to self-doubt) and others. Neurotics sacrifice their own interests for everyone. The main difference between them and other groups of people with disorders is their ability to view their actions realistically, and their critical thinking abilities.

Neurotics behave like this because they have lived this way for so long. Neurosis is usually formed when a child is 4-5 years old, when children start to understand how their actions play out. Parents of neurotics taught them how to be polite and kind to everyone, but not how to be good to themselves. They are likely to manipulate children’s guilt, and children are expected to always yield and please everyone. Neurotics are not able to break free from parents’ authority and influence even in adulthood. They experience troubles with self-expression and low self-esteem, because they were always told that they were not good enough. This is why neurotics are scared of standing out from others, preferring to act average and responsibly perform their duties.

Luckily, neurosis can easily be cured in therapy; sometimes without taking medications. Therapists help their patients to reevaluate their relationships with parents and their words, which in the future helps to separate themselves from family and become more decisive and self-confident.